Okay, confession time. I have a new
obsession. I want these guys to come to my house. I need them to come to me. In
fact, I am trying to figure out how to pull off becoming a straight guy just so
they can work their magic on me. Let’s face it, straight men are not the only
ones who have not been blessed with the talent to pull of the ideal wardrobe, be
the perfect chef, decorate my home to the nines, get the ultimate make-over and
still have the social graces to charm the best of them. I admit it. I am the
perfect straight guy. Well, except for the fact that I love men and I have no
penis. Other than that, I am the perfect candidate for the show. Mental note: In
the future, rethink admitting to being the perfect straight guy before stating
it in a public forum. It just doesn’t seem the same in print as it sounded in my
head. I watched like a marathon of this show this week. I have to tell you, I am
jealous as hell of the guys who get these fab make-overs. I am thinking of
protesting and asking them to make an acception to their “straight guy” rule.
Can you picture it with me? “This weekend on an all new “Queer Eye for the The
Straight Guy”, a shocking new twist: The Fab 5 work their magic on one of their
most challenging subjects yet…a woman. Can they take this hopeless,
anti-Martha soccer mom and make her the new Darling of the PTA? Catch an all new
episode this weekend.” It could happen. Does anyone know the email address to
apply? Oh honeyyyy…….
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GenX writer and storyteller