Way to leave you hanging, right. Tell you to come back and I will tell you what has happened and then I never do. I’m sorry. You see, I have wanted nothing to do with my computer this week. She and I are in a love/hate relationship right now. She delivered an email to me first thing Monday that was unexpected and made me want nothing more to do with email, blogging or writing. Hissy fit? Absolutely. Over reacting? For certain. Feeling better because I know I am being ridiculous? Uhhh, not so much. But you all have been great with the emails and checking on us, that I wanted to make sure I updated you.
So, lean in and I will share you with what happened with my son. Ready? Nothing. Okay, that really isn’t true. I can say that my son and this boy are no longer in the same class. That is the extent of what happened through the school. And the only reason I know that is because the kids know that. (Before I go on let me tell you emphatically that my son’s teacher would move heaven and Earth to ensure my son is safe and is in the best possible environment. Policies tie her hands. I love this woman and would never have made it through this year without her. Just wanted that much to be clear…because I am strange that way!) So, anyway, one of the first things I did was try to find out if I was over-reacting to this situation. I don’t think there are a lot of mothers who would blow this off with a wave of the hand. But I had to make sure by gaging my reactions to those who know me and know my son. It was pretty clear that we should not take this lying down. I did everything I could to find out what was going on within the school. But thanks for the privacy laws, all I know is that “it will be handled.” Why doesn’t this give me comfort. (Sidenote: If you know me in real life and are concerned about this. Feel free to contact me and I will tell you exactly who I am talking about. They may have privacy laws, but I don’t. If no one else can let other parents know about this, I certainly can.)
The school mentioned that it was “certainly my prerogative to call the police” if I felt I needed to. You think? Of course I called. The first officer I spoke to treated me like I was an over reacting mother whose son got his lunch money stolen on the playground. He continually made comments like “He’s how young?” and “So, it wasn’t a direct threat to your son?” Because apparently, unless you are “of age” you are incapable of violence or bad choices. (Keg party kiddos!) AND it appears that a child can threaten anyone he wants in any way he wants as long as he says it to a teacher, principal or some other adult in authority. These are good things to know, kiddos. No accountability! Nothing to keep you in line unless you are “of age”! He also had the audacity to suggest I just “back off and let the school handle this”.
I kept my son home from school the next day. I went back up to the school and pushed some more. Again, to no avail. Monday, I was assured there would not be a problem. That is all I could be told. I sent him to school. It was the longest day of my life. I talked to a new police officer who was actually helpful and had some good advice. He took me seriously. He also connected me with a youth officer and then an officer who specializes in threats and threats of violence against persons. They were nice enough, but still had their hands tied as far as helping goes.
It looks like the bottom line is this: No one can or will tell me anything. This boy is still attending the same school. People will always shock and amaze you when you tell them things like this.
I am honestly not sure which reaction bothered me the most: The people who blew it off and treated me like I was a freak to over react or the people who are normally calm and went off about this. I mean on one hand, I was appalled by the people– especially the ones with children– who acting like I was losing my mind by taking this seriously. I suppose until you fear for your own child and his safety, you just don’t get it. Then again, when the people I depend on to reign me in when I go off on some tangent or start shooting off at the mouth about something I really need to stay quiet about, when they start telling me that I am not taking it seriously enough, that sets me on edge. They are supposed to be telling me I am mental for what I was thinking. Not agree with me.
For now, I have no options short of taking him out of that school. And then he gets punished. He gets removed from his friends and his teacher. Or I wait it out and wait for this to either blow over until this kid pops off again at another adult and they have more to go on. Great choices, huh. Wanna live my life for a day? I know others have it worse. I am not denying that. But honestly, I am really tired of my life right now.
Jenny, however, swears there is a winning lottery ticket in my near future. The odds just insist that must be true!