I have done my best to stay out of this entire Today Show and cocktail playdates issue. For one, my kids are too old for play-dates. Secondly, I think it was blown way out of proportion after the first segment was aired. Today they aired a second piece as a follow up in which my friend Stefanie Wilder-Taylor, author of Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay was in studio. Now, if you read her book or have read her blog, something you are bound to come away with is the fact that she, too, feels that moms really need to stop with the judging already. Hoping she would bring it up, I watched this morning to see how the whole segment would play out.
In case you missed it this morning, here is a link to it. (If that one does not work, there is a clip of of the segment that aired this morning on the Today Show main page.)
I believe that Stefanie did a great job at trying to lighten up the attitude and brought up the PERFECT point: It’s just another hot button issue that people are using to judge each other. And, yes, sometimes that judgment comes out of our own insecurity. The entire “Am I really doing this mothering thing the right way?” Motherhood is tough. There are bound to be times when we question ourselves. But do we really need to question everyone else, too?
I think Stef said a wonderful thing that we need to all hear: “Let’s stop using this as here is another thing to feel guilty about.’” (Slightly paraphrased.) But her point is the same. Stop judging each other and for goodness sake, stop judging yourself so harshly as well!
Isn’t it time to stop pointing fingers? Time to band together? Time to stop selling tickets to the mud-slinging, mommy wars that others are fueling?
I am so over Moms looking at each other and trying to find fault in their parenting or new ways to tell moms how they should be doing things a different way because obviously they have not read the study on blah blah blah. To me, it just seems that every time we do this to each other, we take a giant step backwards. The best advice I ever received as a Mom is that you need to do what is right for you and your family.
I adore Stef and think she handled the whole segment like a pro. She kept it light, made jokes and even got Meredith to admit that after the beating this issue has taken she, too, could use a glass of wine.
All in all I just wish we would start working together as Moms and start supporting each other. The finger pointing? So last year. The mommy wars need a cease fire. Feel free to bring the beverage of your choice to the celebration party–coffee, Diet Coke, wine–who cares. Let’s just do this thing together.
tags: mommy wars, Today Show, motherhood, mommy blogs, mommybloggers.