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Month: July 2008

Yes, I know it is messed up

Yes, I know it is messed up

[Update: Thank you Karen and my geeky husband Clint for helping me to fix this.  Mwah!]

Yes. Yes, I am an idiot and accidentally wiped out my entire header. GO ME! Bear with me while I try to figure out how in the hell I am going to fix it.

GAH! Help!

It’s all about Parenting today

It’s all about Parenting today

I admit it. Sometimes I want to skip out on playing with Gabriella when I am exhausted.  This past weekend was no exception.  But I gave in, as I usually do. We laughed, teased and, yes, cheated. But we had fun together. To think I almost passed up that moment.

…..Read more over at Parenting

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And if you missed these, check them out as well.

How I nearly made the biggest mistake a traveling parent could make.

Suddenly I was aware that I was having so much fun with friends, was so busy networking and so busy just having fun I forgot to do what every mom must do when leaving town without her children: Bring home goodies…

And really?  I am not crazy, I have teenagers.

I used to think that the hardest part of motherhood was toddlerhood. I was sure it became easier as they grew older. I was wrong…

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Go over and say hi!  Let them know that I am not writing into the void.  It would be great to see some familiar faces over there.

BlogHer insanity- the photo edition

BlogHer insanity- the photo edition

I do not want you to get the impression that I went to BlogHer and that one horrible blogger’s comment made it a bad experience for me. (And can I just say how much your comments and emails meant to me. Wow. You are the best readers ever! I mean it!)

This year’s BlogHer was probably one of the best. Any drama was saved for someone else’s mama. I stayed away from it and it stayed away from me.

I did learn some wonderful things at BlogHer. I shall now share them with you.

Trolley Cars are perfect for amateur pole dancing.

Picture stolen from <a href=

Photo stolen from the wonderful MamaLoves.

This is the full size picture so that you don’t think I was alone in my insanity. Oh no! White Trash Mom and Busy Mom were just as guilty. Sort of.

(Again, stolen from MamaLoves. And, yes, I do love her!)

Whenever you are given a cheeseburger and have no place to keep it warm, we ladies have built in burger warmers.

Photo stolen from BusyMom (again)

Photo stolen from the wonderful BusyMom

Okay, and here is where I confess something. Bib? The Michelin Man? Well, he sorta scares the crap out of me. After a traumatizing encounter in the vendor area where I ran from him and hid behind other vendor tables, I thought we had made peace. Not so much. Sunday…he came racing out of a building to get me again. Okay, he is all puffy and nice and would never hurt anyone. Or so they tell me. But look at my expression. I am SO NOT kidding around here. Go. GO AWAY BIB! (Matt? I do adore Matt. Not Bib.)

(Look! He comes racing out all “happy” and check out Mr. Tire Man all pointing and laughing.)

Of course no BlogHer is complete without a Jennster groping.

I even tried to steal myself a new baby but his mother (Julie of Mothergoosemouse) insisted that I give him back. She said the whole “finders keepers” and “calling dibs” totally does not count with her baby. Bummer because I totally fell in love.

Now don’t we make a cute couple?

And finally we end with a quiz for you. Watch the video and answer the question following.


Lay It Down, Sarge. from mizzjenny on Vimeo.

So here is your question:

What are we doing?
A) Being held captive by a minion of Bib’s.
B) Learning how to get our kids to school on time under any circumstances.
C) Who cares? Raymond was driving.
D) All of the above.

So that is just some of the hilarity that ensued at BlogHer this year. I have a post about the amazing things that blew me away coming up later today, but I thought after the previous post we could all use a laugh and real evidence that I had a blast.

But you do have a pretty face

But you do have a pretty face

(Disclaimer: To those who went to BlogHer and felt that in anyway they were snubbed, hurt or brushed off by me, please email me. I was overwhelmed. I mean between my adhd and my anxiety, there were times that I had to mentally shut down. And, yes, there were times that I would be having an amazing conversation with you and then BLAM I realized that what blog you wrote for. I was just enjoying talking to you and it did not click! I just liked you. So I ask you in all sincerity, if I hurt you or made you feel badly in anyway, please email and tell me. I never, ever want to make anyone feel hurt or upset by me. I really am not a bitch. I am just too emotional and get overwhelmed too easily. With over 1,000 brilliant minds and women there, it is hard to not take it in and absorb all of that energy. So when I was barreling down the hallway, it was tunnel vision in survival mode. Forgive me. But please let me know!)

I can’t tell you the number of times I have opened and closed this browser trying to find the right words to talk about BlogHer. I am not sure there are any that will capture what this year meant to me. I am a four-timer, so I have all of the conferences to compare it to. I can say that I walked away from this one with the most positive attitude and best experiences of any of the BlogHerCons that came before.

This year I went with an attitude that i would take care of myself and have my own agenda rather than be at the whim of the crowd or someone who may or may not have the time to be with me. I wanted to catch up with old friends, meet people I have been emailing with for ages and have never met face to face and to make new friends.

I was able to catch up with some old friends. Some I was just able to only hug in passing but we both knew that it was due to the insanity of the weekend and not a lack of desire to spend time together. Some people that I really wanted to meet, I missed in the chaos. I hope we find time to at least stay connected online. Most surprising and wonderful was meeting people I thought I would “enjoy” but ended up absolutely adoring them. I mean, blog stalking (in a good way) adoring them.

I had deep conversations with brilliant minds. I had nonsensical conversations with tons of laughter. I had brief chats that I wish had been longer. I had long conversations that I wish would have never ended. I even got to listen to a most awesome Southern boy accent tell me not to take out my friends while driving like a maniac. (An under control maniac.) And I was able to be traumatized by the Michelin Man.

And then there was the book signing at Macy’s.

Wow. I mean, it was a surreal experience and makes me look forward to more of those and to my own book coming out. Thank you to everyone who stopped by and bought a book and got it signed. (If you didn’t and are interested, contact me.) I had a blast with the whole experience. Thank you for making it so much fun.

All of that I just mention? I will write about in more depth because I want people to know how much they touched me and for those who didn’t go, that it IS for you and YOU do belong if you can go next year.

But I need to get something off of my chest that happened. Something that slammed me against a wall. It had nothing to do with BlogHer the conference. But with one person. The shame of writing about it is so intense but I have to get it out so it doesn’t continue to eat me alive.

And then there was after Macy’s. When I met the meanest blogger of the weekend. All I can say is I am glad that her nametag was either hidden or not on because I would call her out for her rudeness. Our conversation went a bit like this:

Her: HI!! I loved meeting you. I just love your writing. Your personality is even bigger in person than online! You look like you are having so much fun! You are awesome.

Me: (blown away by such kindness) Thank you…

Her: You totally don’t look like your pictures. I didn’t expect you to be fat. You really don’t look it. I mean, you never talk about it. It really surprised me! Really. I don’t mean that in a bad way. Your face and all is so pretty.

Me: uhhhhhhhh……

Her: I hope you don’t take that wrong or anything. *giggle*

Me: uhhhhhhhhh….Yeah, I have to go meet nice people in the bar now.

Seriously? Yes. Seriously. What do you say to that? I immediately went to the comfort of my friends (hoping to find one of them who would want to kick some ass) but I never said anything because really? Who wants to repeat a conversation like that after being devastated by it? I didn’t want to relive that humiliation.

I get it. I know that between my meds, my depression and my thyroid, I have put on way more weight than I want. More than I am comfortable. I have a mirror. I get it. But to have someone say that to me. Well? It absolutely crushed me. Ironically, my biggest fear about going to BlogHer and what really almost kept me from going until 2 weeks before was my weight gain and the fear that I would be judged harshly. I was assured no one was that mean. (WRONG!) (I don’t blame you kind people who convinced me to go. I am glad I did. And who knew someone like this would be there and be so mean??) I am going to hope and pretend this woman was high or drunk.

Why would someone do that? Answer me that. Why?

And if it was you who said it, email me. Because really? I need to know why you did that.

I promise, the good stuff is coming next. I just had to get that out. The inner turmoil of it was eating me alive. I may delete this as soon as I hit publish but maybe if I put it out there, it will take away the power that awful woman has had over my mind. Let it go. Move on. Right?

This post brought to you by Citizens Against Becoming Human, Radioactive Pin Cushions

This post brought to you by Citizens Against Becoming Human, Radioactive Pin Cushions

Why was I so thrilled to leave town and hit the beach for a week (plus travel days)?

Why was I happy to be out of town for 3 weeks?

Why am I looking forward to leaving town again?

Well, for one– the obvious of they are so fun!  (Beach relaxing.  Blogher manic fun.  Both vacations in their own rights.)  But another reason?  I am glad for the break in doctor’s appointments and being a human pin cushion who is probably radio active by now.  Here is the low down that I have not shared.  Because, well, when you know nothing you share nothing.  Usually.  Many times I share a lot and know nothing. But that is pretty much blogging for you.

It started with migraines.  Or wait.  Maybe it started with the hair loss, extreme bone numbing fatigue and weight gain that put me in a league with the Violet from Willie Wonka.  (Egg or chicken at this point.)  So off to the doctor we go.

First up, blood work.  It appears that my thyroid hates me.  We are working on making nice with it but really? When it went all bad ass and decided to go after my weight and make me fat, it was ON.  I am not playing nice with that thyroid now.  I told the doctor to just rip it out.  He thought that was rather extreme.   I owe a lot to Y of Joy Unexpected for getting me to actually get to the doctor and check things out rather than just play the “I am just tired, fat and going bald” card.  Thanks, Y!  I owe you.

Then came the radio active dye that I got to inject into my veins for an MRI.  They wanted to see if they could find a reason for the migraines.  Good news!  They found no tumors, lesions or blood clots in my brain.  Which is what they were worried about with my history and my Mom’s history.  AND now there is proof I do in fact have a brain.  w00t!

What they did find is a 6mm tumor “or suspicious growth” in my sinuses.

Say what?

Did that report I read say t-u-m-o-r?

So when my doctor called and told me to get into the ENT to check it out, I told him I would as soon as I could get there but really?  Totally had plans.  (That will stun a doctor into silence.)

Me: Will it grown?

Dr: No.

Me: Will it hurt me?

Dr: No.

Me: Will it kill me by the end of July?

Dr: No.

Me: Should I be running around freaking and wailing in fear and agony?

Dr: No.

Me: So it can wait until the end of July.

Dr:  Uhhhh….I am guessing yes is the only right answer.

Me:  You are a smart Doc. Good answer.

I mean seriously?  A nose tumor?  I am scared of a nose ring. But whatev.  It is what it is and I am not worrying until the end of July.

But that is why I have been offline.  More testing and more radioactive fun.  Oh, and the pin cushion fun.

So at BlogHer…yes, I really am having fun.  (Contrary to accusations that were made in a prior year.)

There you have it.  No more to say until we know more.  Mmmmm’kay?

While you were doing that, I was doing this.

While you were doing that, I was doing this.

See! I still exist.  After nearly 3 weeks (or has it been 3 weeks?) off the grid, I am finally trying to jump back into the world that exists in this computer.  In fact, I am guessing that I will finally get in the groove just in time to head off to BlogHer in San Francisco next week.   So what kept me offline for so long?  Well, I was chillin at the beach. Thinking I would have no trouble getting hooked up and online, I never mentioned that I would be leaving. Turns out, getting on and being able to work and chat and check email and such was not the easy time I thought it would be.  Yet being offline for so long was just what I needed.  I know I owe way too many people way too many responses, email, posts etc.  Now that I am home, hooked up and able to connect with the outside world, I will do my best to catch up. Really. (Did you notice the “do my best” part?  Yeah, still out of my groove.)

But I am sure you understand can I understand why.

While you were getting ready for work, I was doing this:

And for most of the day when I would normally be home doing chores or trying to keep the kids busy, I was hanging out here:

And then as the late afternoon hit, I did a little bit of this:

And as the day drew to a close, I sat in amazement watching this:

Is it any wonder why it is tough to get back into the groove?

Next up: Taking on the jellies, BlogHer stuff and a way too late post about a book I was totally supposed to post about ages ago.  For now, a nap.  This blogging stuff is tough to get back into.  I need my beach back.