Have you ever been to your class reunion and looked around thinking:
1) How have they done so much in the same amount of time that I have done so little?
Or:
2) Why do these people look so young and I feel so old…Oh crap! I am in the wrong room! This is a 10 year reunion and OMG I am so not going to fit in here! Do I leave or just hang out and fake it?
Or even:
3) What if the don’t remember me? What if who I was and who I am now don’t fit in with my friends? Have I been so bad at keeping in touch that I am irrelevant and only made the list because ‘Hey, we have to invite everyone!’
Okay, maybe that isn’t the best analogy but it is how I feel about coming back to regular blogging. You see, I have been out of the game so long it feels weird just jumping in with a “Hey, y’all!” but at the same time, I miss blogging regularly. I miss the friendships that I have built. I miss the amazing feedback. I miss just coming here for fun and blogging and keeping it real. Here in my home I created 7 years ago. My online home. I’ve missed it.
I did what I promised myself I never would. I stopped blogging and let myself be censored by the people around me. I have always said and still stand behind the fact that I won’t say anything on my blog I won’t say to someone’s face. That will always be true. It’s just that the world has become a lot smaller.
There are people in my everyday life who would like nothing more than to see me screw up. I know more about the people around me and things they say than I let on. And out of fear of being too real, too raw or too open, I have in effect allowed those people to muzzle me.
Not anymore.
I have too many things to share. I love my blogging too much. I have made too many amazing connections. I won’t let anyone take that away from me.
So, here I am. Ready. Real. And Raw. Think you can handle it? If not, just move along so that the rest of us can enjoy ourselves and I can get back to the business of being me.
To quote one of my favorite authors and philosophical gurus, Dr. Seuss:
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
Wherever you are, I will find you.
Wait, that sounds wrong. But I know you, and you’ll laugh anyway.
I’m so glad that I’ll see you again this summer in New York. But even if I didn’t, we’d still be friends.
That Seuss was a wise wise man…
Welcome back!
I am a very infrequent commenter but a long time reader – yours is one of the first blogs I ever read. I have no recollection of how I found you but I am so glad you are going to be back regularly. I love your writing and have missed reading you. Welcome back!
I just just ‘found’ you and am delighted. Look forward to reading more of what you have to say… and getting to know you better!
I know what you mean about the world becoming smaller. Very few people in my world know about my blog (you’ll see why should you visit it) but many of their stories get broadcast. I often wonder if that’s all right.
Come visit me.
http://ivyandhaley.blogspot.com
Ivy
Glad to hear it! I’ve been popping in here and there and haven’t seen much so was hoping you’d be making a comeback.
That’s one of my favorite quotes too. Its so true, and so many people can;t see things that way.
I’m a new read to your blog. I found one of your old posts a while back and loved it. I’m happy you’ll be writing more often now.