I’m sure by now everyone knows that I’m pregnant… very pregnant. What everyone doesn’t know is that I love to eat and drink everything that is no good for a growing fetus. My 1st trimester I could not eat anything and keep it down. I mean nothing, nada, zilch. By the 2nd trimester I was on my way to recovery, as I like to call it. I could eat food and let me tell ya, I made up for three months of not eating. I still can’t have seafood (love it), still can’t drink coffee (need it), still can’t do the wine (sneak a glass here and there), shouldn’t do the ice cream and chocolate, but I do (my fat ass proves it). Now that I’m at the end of the 3rd trimester the Doc. is saying “Whooooa Nelly”. Lets slow down on the intake, maybe a trip to the nutritionist is in your near future. What? I’m not going to diet, that can’t be good for the baby. See how I’m thinking of the baby before me…I’m a good Mom I know what this kid needs. Besides this is the last one…the last time I will have an excuse to be overweight and can’t diet. BRING ON THE BON BONS!!
There are a few of you out there who know me, for those of you that don’t let me introduce myself. I am the better half of Genuine, also known as Mrs. G. Now that we have the intros out of the way, I want to thank Jenn for asking me to guest blog. I am still trying to decide if I want to jump into the world of blogmania. Genuine has met so many wonderful people; it has become more and more tempting. So here we go on our joint venture to see if I have what it takes to become a world famous blogger.
Let me set the scene…
One week day morning. One Genuine Family trying to get out the door…on time. One four year old fighting to get buckled into her brand spanking new booster seat. One Genuine Daddy trying anything to convince her it’s “THE LAW”. One neighbor who happens to be a state trooper.
Up until this morning our kids have never put up a fight getting into the car. Yes we bribe them with the DVD player, don’t all parents? Genuine thinking he is smarter than Genuine Girl tries to end the argument by telling her she will go to jail if she does not promptly buckle her seat belt. By the screaming heard 2 miles away you would’ve thought he cut her arm off. I’m sure the neighbors thought the same. Out walks mommy into the middle of WWIII. Genuine is saying that Mr. state trooper will put her in jail if he sees her out of her booster seat. I’m giving Genuine that what the hell are you saying look, while trying to get genuine girl calmed down. Not only does she not want to be in her booster she is now going to be terrified of Mr. State trooper. Just what we need!
Now that the situation has finally calmed down we head on out with a half hour commute staring us in the face. That’s right, you guessed it. Mommy had to explain that the police do not put children in jail and that daddy was just trying to get her buckled into her seat. Okay then she says, “Daddy is a liar”. “No” I said, “ He just wants you to be safe in the car. If we got into an accident you could get hurt if you were not in your seat.” I try to explain that little kids have to be buckled in for safety. Wrong answer, she screams at the top of her lungs that she is a BIG girl and she will not go to jail. Okay, here we go again! After half an hour of explaining why people go to jail and why BIG kids need to be buckled in their seats, I have never been so happy to go to work. I have also never been so eager to put Genuine on “The List”. And yes, I am still dreading the next time genuine girl sees Mr. State Trooper. She is like an elephant…she never forgets. I can just imagine the conversation she will have with him. “My daddy says you put kids in jail” UUUGGGHHHH!!!!!!